Dating a man in an open marriage

We've been consistently super happy together for almost a decade!

The other constant is that since becoming "monogamish" (and eventually, "poly"), we've always dated separately.

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Making the other person feel valued and primary is extremely important to Ben and me. We spend most of our free time together and try to be intentional about the quality of that time (e.g. We've both acknowledged that if our foundation wasn't strong, we would probably feel more jealousy. Everyone knows right off the bat that we are happily married, and thus not looking for a lifelong commitment.

We also feel strongly about treating the people we date with respect and care (and expect to be treated the same).

Ben was comfortable with me exploring it, and I casually went on a few dates.

From there, we talked about opening the relationship on his end as well, and I was surprised by how nonjealous I felt.

We believe in safe sex for everyone, not just open couples! It was not the same as the deep love I feel for Ben, but it was fun and meaningful.

Ben didn't feel threatened and was an amazing source of support when we eventually broke up.

If he did fall in love, I don't think it would bother me.

We both feel strongly that our relationships with other people don't take away from how we feel about each other.

I am a bit more of a rule follower, but definitely liberal and nonjudgmental.

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